The topic of self-care for moms can be interpreted in so many different ways. A good mother can be loving, nurturing and giving to her child (or children), but what about doing the same for herself? This is something I’ve had to think a lot about since having Jackson. The importance of self-care can be incredibly difficult to make happen.
Since becoming a mom, I’ve fallen under the new-mom trap where I debate with myself if I should go to pilates or be home for when Jackson wakes up in the morning. Should I go out with my girlfriends for a night out or miss bedtime. Take a trip for pleasure/work or miss seeing him for a few days. These are probably the same things that go through any moms head when they are making decisions to take some much needed me time. But what I also find is that I sometimes can’t even find the time to take the photography class I’ve signed up for and keep postponing. It’s a struggle and it’s real.
When you become a mom there are two things that happen – 1) your priorities completely shift and you go into this mode where you are taking care of the family, making sure they are healthy, happy, food is on the table, etc. 2) you put your needs on the back burner but you always having it there on one shoulder saying make time for pilates this week, go get a blow out so that you don’t show up to another client meeting with a wet bun or take those 10 minutes between meetings to check emails and go get a coffee.
In my hectic lifestyle I can sum up with a handful of things that make me incredibly happy, that make me feel fulfilled and when I go to sleep at the end of the day it makes me smile if I get some or one of these things in for myself.
1.) Morning cup of tea. Sometimes this happens by myself in the morning before everyone is up or I enjoy it while we run around trying to get ready for the day.
2.) A workout. This may consist of actually booking a pilates class or taking a walk with Jackson at the end of the day in order to get some fresh air. Sometimes it’s a magical day when I get both of these in (usually Wednesday).
3.) Take a pause. As I get caught up in my days I find that the most important thing to do when I start to go a little coo-coo is take a pause. Step away from what I’m doing and come back to it 15 to 20 minutes later. It makes a whirlwind of difference to have that time.
4.) Friends. This is a hard one to find time for, which it shouldn’t be. Even if it’s talking to my girlfriends on the phone or sending them a text just to check in on life, it’s important to keep those relationships because they are my rocks when I need them.
5.) Eating dinner with my family. This is a HUGE priority in our house and something I cherish every night. It’s a moment for all of us to check in with each other and where there are absolutely no distractions – well except for Jackson throwing food on the floor. I come away from our family dinner feeling less stressed and I have a sense calmness before finishing the tasks that need to be done before going to bed.
6.) Sleep. So important in order for me to have my sanity for the next day. No matter how long my to-do list is I have to get a good night sleep or else I’m worthless the next day. I’ve learned that I can’t always get everything done and that is just OK.
Self-care can take on a different meaning for everyone. I felt a little bit hesitant writing about how I view my own self-care but it’s important to know that self-care is about doing something for yourself that you love. It doesn’t have to be something you do alone but more importantly something for you. I hope that by reading all of our different rituals of self-care that it inspires or motivates you to start to do a few more things for yourself. Even if you aren’t a mom, it’s something that every woman needs to prioritize.
Be sure to check out the other amazing Real Moms takes on self-care:
The Effortless Chic | Apartment 34 | Could I Have That | Parker Etc | Sarah Sherman Samuel | Our Style Stories | Ave Styles | The Refined Woman | A Daily Something
And you can also check out our past Real Moms posts on sleeping, being a working mom and travel here!